A stand-up comic is judged by every line. Singers get applause at the end of their song no matter how bad they are. Phyllis Diller Read Quote
Tranquilizers work only if you follow the advice on the bottle – keep away from children. Phyllis Diller Read Quote
The real reason your pro tells you to keep your head down is so you can’t see him laughing at you. Phyllis Diller Read Quote
I’ve been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? Phyllis Diller Read Quote
I wanted to become me, totally me. The more me, the better. I instinctively knew this and I was right. Phyllis Diller Read Quote
There’s so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto. Phyllis Diller Read Quote
