Every day, I wake up and ask, ‘Am I hungry?’ If I’m physically hungry, I eat something that’s hopefully good for me, and then do it again in a few hours. If I get a phone call I don’t like, I’ll say to myself, ‘Is that the reason I want to eat something?’ If it is, I try not to do it. It’s literally a lifestyle. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
I gained weight, and that started a 32-year struggle with weight and exercise and body image problems. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
Howard Stern gave me the best advice about Twitter and the N word. He said maybe onstage people get the intention behind the joke, but a tweet is 140 characters or less, and maybe that’s why people overreact. I don’t need to rustle any more feathers and lose any investors. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
Baywatch’ sucks so bad. I didn’t watch it the first time around; I’m sure not going to buy a DVD. But really, you just kind of find out the categories of what’s most foolish about these people. With Hasselhoff, it’s obviously the huge man-tits with chest hair, probably a lot about his crappy acting, obviously the hamburger video – that’s huge. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
Before, I didn’t do celebrity stuff, ’cause Kathy Griffin did that, but now, if you’re going to make jokes on Twitter, you have to stay current. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
I’m obsessed with reality TV anyway – I use my knowledge of that stuff to make jokes on Twitter and Facebook to get more people to sign up to be fans. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
Betty White is so old that on her first game show ever, the prize was fire. Lisa Lampanelli Read Quote
